Battle Of The TV Bands: The Horsehead Collective Vs. Sh*tpope

09.17.18 11 months ago 2 Comments

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American Vandal and GLOW have a few things in common. They’re both Netflix comedies. They both use humor to get to more serious issues, with American Vandal examining the effects of social media and GLOW looking at sexism and equality in the workplace. And, as of their second seasons, they both feature awful teen bands that I love with every single droplet of blood gushing through my veins.

Yes, the time has come to talk about The Horsehead Collective and Shitpope. And to attempt to decide which one was better. It’s going to be tough. And unnecessary. I could very easily just say “Both are great!” and be done with it. I probably should, to be honest. But that’s not nearly as much fun and also I can’t file a one-sentence article without getting yelled at, so here we are. The battle begins.

The Horsehead Collective

Netflix

The Horsehead Collective is a techno group that has had more lineup changes than Guns N Roses. If we’re extending this analogy, and we are, that makes Kevin McClain — the intentionally odd first Turd Burglar suspect, who often wears a newsboy cap and has many opinions about horchata — the group’s version of Axl Rose, as he is the group’s only consistent member. He started the group with his once and future friend Tanner and briefly replaced Tanner with an awesome middle school kid named Myles, in part to fill the void left by Tanner and in-part to re-corner the middle school market. I hope The Horsehead Collective hits it big and Myles writes a tell-all. I really like Myles.

The group is called The Horsehead Collective because, as you can see, its members wear horse masks while playing lousy electronic music at birthday parties, kind of like an equestrian Daft Punk that has songs titled “Digital Refrigerator” and sucks tremendously. I wouldn’t normally say something like “lousy electronic music” because art is subjective and people like different things, but I feel justified in this case for two reasons. First of all, because this is the official Netflix subtitle that pops up when the music plays.

Netflix

And second, because we have eyewitness (earwitness?) testimony.

Netflix

Case closed. The Horsehead Collective is bad. I adore them.

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