TV

‘Franklin & Bash’ Was Way Serious, Bro

Sup.

It’s your boy Danger GuerrerBro, back with another recap of “Franklin & Bash” aka “Shortbro & Tallbro.” And you guys, this episode was VERY serious. Like there weren’t any killer parties or old lady hookers or young lady hookers or sluts in bikinis or ANYTHING. At first I was all “What? This show sucks like that movie Amistad about the black bros where they cast Matthew McConaughey and didn’t let him surf or bang Kate Hudson. What a waste.” But then I thought more about it and was like, “Hold on, selfbro. Maybe that’s the lesson. Maybe life isn’t all about doing shots with topless chicks while playing by your own rules and having sweet hair and sometimes helping old dudes who can’t get it up. Maybe sometimes you have to grow up and, like, be serious, and come up with a plan about tricking your client into punching someone to get out of his contract while you’re SOBER instead of at your house party.” Sh-t’s deep, son.

Okay, on to the recap.

So the episode starts and Franklin and Bash are way into an office curling match but there’s no time for that because BOOM old dude client walks in with his kinda hot daughter and head honcho guy is like, “No time for messing around you’re totes on the case Franklin and Bash” and the clients are all “Yeah that sounds good” so they go meet up and old dude goes “Guess who caught the old Kirk Gibson home run ball from the 1988 World Series and has it in this box and now his a-hole doucheface sons are fighting him for it ’cause it’s worth BANK BROSEPH? Me,” and Franklin’s all “I LOVE BASEBALL SO I WILL TAKE THIS CASE SERIOUSLY.” Done, client #1.

Then later sexy lady lawyer who used to be on “The Jamie Foxx Show” comes in and is like “I need Franklin and/or Bash because my client is a total reality show Dad jagoff and you guys know what that’s like,” and Franklin’s all “You go Bash because I love baseball and this case is about baseball so I got this,” so Bash goes and the client is Tom Arnold. Client #2.

Also, dick lawyer guy has a problem with a secret freaky email attachment that got sent around and he needs deleted because he wants to be a judge and Franklin goes “Yeah? Blow me,” which is MAJOR LOLs but then dick lawyer goes “No seriously,” and they’re like “Fine, talk to our Middle Eastern bro computer bro,” so he’s kinda client #3.

Case #1 – So most of the episode focuses on the old dude with the baseball case. Franks and Bashy go to meet with the douchey sons and their lawyer’s an idiot so they’re all “This is gonna be easy” but then when they go to court the douches got rid of their idiot lawyer and hired a new one and, BROS, it’s Franklin’s dad and he’s a legend for being a great lawyer and a snake. So Franklin puts old dude on the stand and is like “Be honest it’s your ball” and old dude is like “Yup” but then Franklin’s dad goes “Yeah but didn’t you say the kids could have the ball when they grew up and stopped fighting?” and old dude is like “Oh yeah, I guess I did,” and then Franklin gets all pissed and the judge is like “Knock it off.” But then Franklin calls one of the brothers and tricks them into getting into an argument over a dead turtle (RIP Shelley) so they ARE still fighting and Franklin’s like “Yup, I’m gonna win.”

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