Jay Mohr to Play Charlie Sheen (Kinda)

03.30.11 7 years ago 3 Comments

“Law & Order: Criminal Intent” has ripped a WINNING story from the headlines: Jay Mohr, owner of the saddest hair this side of Jeremy Piven,  will guest star in an upcoming episode, playing a character based off of Charlie Sheen. Deadline says:

Mohr’s character, Nyle Brite, is from a different area of the arts: he is a a “rockstar” fashion designer whose every creation turns to gold.

“Nyle is so hot right now he could take a crap, wrap it in tinfoil, put a couple fish hooks on it and sell it to Queen Elizabeth as earrings.”

His badboy reputation of cocaine benders and call-girl parties only skyrockets his career and mints him as the “lovable rogue.” … Since L&O:CI is a crime drama, the plot of the episode includes a murder as  a guest at one of Brite’s parties turns up dead.

Actually, that part isn’t fictionalized. Let’s not forget that porn star Chloe Jones died after partying with Sheen. I don’t really have a joke for that, I’m just reminding everyone that Charlie Sheen is like a partially trained circus bear: lovably charming, but prone to random violence. Also, circus bears love cocaine.

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