For those of you who didn’t notice, the first of many presidential primaries took place at the Iowa Caucus on Monday night. Sen. Ted Cruz (R-Texas) beat New York real-estate mogul Donald Trump by a small but significant margin, Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton barely made it past rival Bernie Sanders (and even won one precinct by coin toss), and #StickerBoy launched a bright career in politics. That’s a lot of news to keep tabs on, especially when the election itself won’t happen until November. Hence, why Jimmy Kimmel Live‘s “Lie Witness News” segment took to the streets of Hollywood to see who voted.
Obviously, no one walking along Hollywood Boulevard voted in the Iowa Caucus on Monday. Why? Because they were meandering around a location that was roughly 1,700 miles to the west of Iowa. (Coincidentally, there is an Iowa City, California, just over 400 miles north of Los Angeles.) As host Jimmy Kimmel put it, “[We asked] people if they got out to vote in it, which of course they did not. Most people have to be in Iowa to vote in the Iowa Caucus.”
Sure enough, the Jimmy Kimmel Live crew found enough passersby who were willing to falsely admit that they had in fact voted in the Iowa Caucus. When pressed for details, they claimed they’d voted at nearby elementary schools and “the Lutheran Church in Hollywood,” where the lines weren’t too long, the volunteers were nice and the coffee and donuts were free.
Geographical inconsistencies aside, however, anyone who has ever voted in a local, state or federal election can immediately tell that most of these responses were lies. How? Because there are usually lines, the volunteers (if any) are generally tired and want to go home, and the only free thing given out is a patriotic sticker meant to ostracize non-voters. ‘Mericuh.