Tony Hale Reveals Possibly The Worst Thing He’s Ever Done In His Life

Tony Hale was on Late Night with Seth Meyers Wednesday night, promoting his appearance in American Ultra, which comes out this week. But, more importantly than the movie he was plugging, Hale took the appearance as an opportunity to finally unburden his soul with a deep, dark secret he’s been keeping for years and years, since he was just a hapless, geeky middle-schooler.

See, Hale was an army brat, and his family moved around a lot, and starting out as the new kid at school is daunting enough, even when you’re not the (approximately) 14-year-old version of Tony Hale. So, to attempt to bond with a cute girl — who had unfortunately lost a close family member at some point in then-recent history — Hale in turn faked the death of a family member of his own. Apparently, this confession will come as surprise to not just the cute girl, who he stayed in touch with throughout high school, but the family member in question, who was just in town for the American Ultra premiere.

But, hey! At least it must feel good to get that off his chest. And it’s not like he killed anybody or anything… unless he’s saving that story for Colbert. (Sorry, Seth.)