What's On Tonight: What the Hell Happened to Joey Lawrence?

Hatfields & McCoys (History) — The final installment of this three-night miniseries — which debuted with the highest ratings in cable history for a non-sports broadcast — airs tonight. Unless you’ve already sunk your life into the first four hours, I wouldn’t bother with the last installment. It’s pretty bad.

Melissa & Joey (ABC Family) — Joey Lawrence has gone from the cover of Teen Beat to the poster child of steroids abuse. Good God, man. Who thought that Six would come out the best in the “Blossom” equation.

Dogs in the City (CBS) — That Sex in the City reality show for dogs that we warned you about in April? It’s real, and it’s here. God help us.

Stanley Cup Finals: Kings at Devils Game 1 (NBC) — Even if you hate hockey, given your other television options tonight, this is your best bet.

Drive (Instant Netflix) — My favorite movie of 2011 is on Netflix Instant now, and if you like quiet mood flicks punctuated by sudden ultraviolence, you cannot do better than Drive, which stars Baby Goose, Bryan Cranston, and Albert Brooks in a role unlike you’ve ever seen him.

LATE NIGHT LISTINGS: Everything is in reruns this week except for Ferguson (who has Howie Mandel), Jon Stewart (who has Dan Rather), and Colbert (who has Alan Alda).

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