The Young Pope Popedown is a list of the five craziest and/or most notable things that happened in each episode of HBO’s The Young Pope, ranked from least to most crazy and/or notable. Like a countdown, but with popes.
5. We are off to the future
Whoosh buzzzzz wheee welcome to the future! Specifically, nine months into the future, as this episode zips us past some boring stuff and drops us back in where the action is hot. Gutierrez is a cardinal now. Tomosso is steamed because he’s been passed over, again, despite being in possession in hot-hot secrets, many of which were spilled to him in moonlit semi-confessionals on the roof with a hoodie-clad pope. And if you’re thinking to yourself, “Hmm. Nine months. That seems like an oddly specific amount of time. Like, say, exactly the amount of time it takes for a pregnancy to run from beginning to end,” well, you are really on to something because heeeyyyy there Esther’s brand new miracle baby, who is named Pius, like the man she tried to seduce into a blackmail plot by placing his hand on her bosom, no this is fine, nobody worry, cool.
Anyway, Lenny comes to visit her in the hospital carrying many flowers. She hands him the baby. What could possibly go wron-
HE DROPPED THE BABY. THE POPE DROPPED THE BABY.
I literally gasped when this happened. There are obvious metaphors at play here (Lenny abandoned as a child, Lenny uncomfortable around children, his inability to nurture, etc.), but man alive, the Pope dropped the baby!
4. Do not mess with a Handsome Pope
Now that he has neutered Voiello (temporarily?), the Pope needs a new adversary, and that adversary was given to us in the form of a progressive new Italian Prime Minister. They met in the Vatican. It did not go great!
The short version of events is as follows: The Catholic Church is losing money and followers due to Lenny’s hardline stances, and the Prime Minister wants to use its diminished status to open up Italy to gay marriage and pro-choice policies and new restrictive tax rules against the Church. Lenny wants the opposite — presenting his items in an actual written list of demands, not unlike a supervillain — and threatens to wipe the prime minister out in the next election by making his dramatic first public appearance and seducing the crowd, and then re-hydrating a dried up old rule that prevents Catholics from voting in Italian elections. It’s quite a conversation. You really should see the faces Jude Law makes when he talks.
Which is fine. But the best part of it all is that a big part of Lenny’s threat is that he’s so damn handsome that people will do what he wants. That’s what he’s talking about in that screencap, with his blues eyes. He compares himself to Jesus multiple times. It’s so conceited and insane that it’s almost endearing somehow. I mean, he is threatening to use his face as a weapon. I hope Jude Law does this in real life, too. I would.