There are few heads of hair in Hollywood as lustrous as Armie Hammer’s. If you agree, don’t watch the above Instagram video. It’s like sitting through the Texas Chain Saw Massacre, but instead of ground up big city tourists it’s the handsome follicles of the guy who now signs fans’ peaches thanks to Call Me By Your Name.
The occasion? Talking to Jimmy Fallon. The acclaimed actor — and onetime former-almost-Batman — is on tomorrow night’s The Tonight Show, to promote his new film, the Ruth Bader Ginsberg biopic On the Basis of Sex, which co-stars Felicity Jones as the Supreme Court Justice goddess.
Why that necessitated him shaving his head is beyond us. His caption is mysterious and succinct: “Everyone who is on @jimmyfallon pregames differently for the show. Now I am ready.”
Maybe he’s about to shoot a movie where he’s sadistically bald. Or maybe it’s sly commentary about that time Fallon playfully rustled the hair of the man who later became our 45th president, thereby normalizing someone who would one day decide to deport thousands of refugees from the Vietnam War, for no discernible reason other than to remind everyone he really is a Bond villain.
Hair, of course, grows back, and he’ll have to do just that if he ever wants to make that Call Me By Your Name sequel. Whatever the reason, if only one thing in this world can bring us together, maybe it’s our collective sadness over the passing of Armie Hammer’s hair.