Bill O’Reilly Concocts A Clothing-Size Conspiracy Theory, And Gets Shredded Like A Too-Tight T-Shirt

The hits keep coming at Bill O’Reilly, and he may be crumbling under the pressure in his own way. The devoted podcaster, newly-minted Skyper, and former Fox News host was idly tweeting, it seems, on Wednesday night after news that more sexual harassment accusers had joined a defamation suit against him. O’Reilly switched the subject with one of his trademark “Tip of the Day” installments, which used to air as a regular fixture during his long-running program but now arrive in tweet form, and no one really knows how the heck he settled upon this subject matter.

A frustrated O’Reilly may been upset about a bad fit while trying on clothes from his own closet? He wildly tweet-accused clothing manufacturers of “stealthily” reducing the material they use to cut back on costs. As a result, O’Reilly believes that people would be wise to “size-up” while ordering clothes. Because he’s found that “an XL used to do it” for him, but he’s “now XXL.”

What a useful Tip of the Day, right? Not so much, and speaking as a woman and purchaser of clothing, I can attest to the opposite effect. Many clothing companies actually prefer to “vanity size,” meaning that they’ll label a true size 10 as a size 8, and folks are more likely to buy the brand that tells them that they’re smaller than they really are. It makes no sense, from a marketing standpoint, for retailers to tell people that they are larger than their true size, but O’Reilly may be in denial here. It happens, but most folks don’t tweet such thoughts like a secret of the universe.

As one might expect, O’Reilly is receiving some mocking pats on the head. No one has said “bless your little cotton socks” yet, but this tweet comes close.

Naturally, the subject has also turned to razor-sharp takes on the rising price of O’Reilly’s settlements for alleged sexual misconduct.

And folks cannot resist pointing out that O’Reilly’s exhibiting denial symptoms that may have triggered a bad case of tin-foil-hat syndrome.

Poor Bill. The holidays are not kind when one is confronted with a snug pair of jeans. (That’s why someone invented yoga pants.)