Chelsea Handler is a human living in America. Therefore, she has an opinion on Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt’s divorce. (It’s one of life’s inevitabilities: death, taxes, and a fascination with celebrity breakups.) Handler’s more personally invested than most, though. She’s BFFs with Jennifer Aniston, who Pitt was married to from 2000-2005 before he met Jolie on the set of Mr. and Mrs. Smith, and the rest is sexy spy history. Surprisingly, though, Handler sided with Pitt in a clip from her late-night Netflix talk show.
“Brad and Angelina always said they wouldn’t get married until everyone could get married,” Handler said. “And I always said I wouldn’t get married until they got divorced, so I’m officially accepting proposals. I’m ready.”
She’s also ready to dig into Jolie. “There are rumors that part of the problem was that Brad was allegedly drinking and smoking too much weed. I wonder why he would need to self-medicate. Maybe because he could have been spending the last 12 years at Lake Como hanging out with George Clooney and Matt Damon, instead of being stuck in a house with 85 kids speaking 15 different languages. Oh yeah, because he married a f*cking lunatic.”
That seems… harsh.
Handler sounds like she’s casting Pitt in a bad sitcom where the man wants to be a man, and not have to worry about, ugh, raising the children, but the ol’ ball and chain (Jolie) won’t let him. It’s a surprise Handler didn’t end her monologue with “women, am I right?” Anyway, this isn’t the first time she’s revealed her opinion of Jolie. “She seems like a demon,” Handler said in 2013. “It has nothing to do with Jennifer. As a woman, I know when you see somebody walking across the room that’s a bad girl. I just don’t like Angelina Jolie.” Angelina Jolie probably doesn’t like Chelsea Handler, either.