There’s always the tweet. And a turkey. Since the 1980s (not the 1940s, as widely believed), the president has pardoned a turkey every Thanksgiving. It’s a weird, barbaric tradition when you think about it for even a second, but so is Thanksgiving. Anyway!
In 2018, Donald Trump pardoned two birds, Peas and Carrots, based on the results of an online poll. “The winner of this vote was decided by a fair and open election conducted on the White House website. This was a fair election,” he said to light-to-nonexistent laughter on the Rose Garden lawn. “Unfortunately Carrots refused to concede and demanded a recount, and we’re still fighting with Carrots. And I will tell you, we’ve come to a conclusion: Carrots, I’m sorry to tell you, the result did not change. It’s too bad for Carrots.” Hmm, this whole “refusing to concede a fair election” thing sounds familiar…
FLASHBACK: In 2018, President Trump attacked Carrots the turkey for refusing to concede he had lost the vote on the White House turkey pardon contest.
"This was a fair election… unfortunately, Carrots refused to concede and demanded a recount."
— andrew kaczynski🤔 (@KFILE) November 23, 2020
In case you’re wondering, Peas and Carrots “were implied to be still alive as of November 2019,” unlike Trump’s chance of serving a second term. This year’s ritualistic turkeys are Corn and Cob, who will be driven from Iowa “to Washington, D.C. in a van, but the second they arrive, the celebration begins. The turkeys get a red carpet welcome at a fancy hotel. They have their own room, adjoining with their caretaker,” according to WQAD. “On Thanksgiving, they will be 19 weeks, weighing about 42 pounds each.”
If you’re not Team Cob, you’re wrong.
Which turkey should President Trump pardon at this year's National Thanksgiving Turkey Pardoning Ceremony—Corn or Cob?
— The White House (@WhiteHouse) November 23, 2020