Jen Psaki Had The Best Response To Texas Gov. Greg Abbott’s Absurd Claim That He Will ‘Eliminate’ All Rape In Texas

While scientists and researchers around the world are desperately working to get ahead of COVID-19 and the many—and much deadlier—virus variants it’s now spawning, Texas Governor Greg Abbott has apparently been busy working on a cure for an issue that has plagued the world for as long as men have had penises: Rape!

On Wednesday, while defending the Lone Star State’s controversial—and possibly illegal—decision to ban all abortion procedures after six weeks of pregnancy, a reporter pushed Abbott on his unwillingness to make exceptions in cases of rape or incest. Rather than engage in some sort of honest or meaningful conversation in which the governor might attempt to defend his position, he instead vowed that he was dedicated to… doing away with rape altogether. Wait, that was a feasible option all along?!

As The Washington Post reports, Abbott’s precise (and precisely idiotic) response to the question was:

“Rape is a crime, and Texas will work tirelessly to make sure that we eliminate all rapists from the streets of Texas by aggressively going out and arresting them and prosecuting them and getting them off the streets.”

This is groundbreaking stuff, people. The governor of Texas has declared that “rape is a crime” and vowed to “eliminate all rapists” from his state by “aggressively going out and arresting them.”

The utter stupidity—and offensiveness—of this comment was not lost on White House press secretary Jen Psaki, who went full C.J. Cregg when asked to respond to Abbott’s promise to create a rape-free Texas:

“Well if Governor Abbott has a means of eliminating all rapists or all rape from the United States, then there’d be bipartisan support for that. But given that there has never in history of the country, and the world, been any leader who’s ever been able to eliminate rape, [or] eliminate rapists from our streets… it’s one of the many reasons [why] women in Texas should have access to health care. So it does not change our objectives, it does not change our commitment… Our Department of Justice is continuing to look at legal options. Our Department of Health and Human Services is also continuing to look at all options. And the president has made clear that it’s a priority to do everything we can to ensure women in Texas have access to healthcare.”

In other words: Call us when you’ve solved the rape problem, Governor Abbott. And make sure you tell us how you plan to address the approximately 90 percent of rapes and sexual assaults that go unreported.