Viral

Michael Flynn’s New Utterly Batsh*t Conspiracy Theory: The Deep State Might Be Putting COVID Vaccines Into Your Ranch Dressing

Trump’s former National Security advisor Michael Flynn is peddling a new Covid conspiracy theory and it may just be the most bizarre one we’ve heard so far.

Now, just as a reminder, Flynn — once a respected military general — pleaded guilty in 2017 to lying to the FBI about meetings he had with a Russian ambassador. He’s gone on to spread dangerous misinformation about the results of the 2020 Presidential Election and has publicly stated he believes the current pandemic was created specifically to harm Trump during an election year. He should be in prison right now, but, here we are, listening to his absolutely bonkers hysterics on conservative podcast shows.

Flynn guested on one such show this week to try out his latest deep state paranoia pitch and it’s a doozy. Flynn told “The Thrivetime Show” host Clay Clark (via Rolling Stone) that he thinks the government might be sneaking Covid vaccines in our salad dressing. You read that right. Salad dressing, people.

“Somebody sent me a thing this morning where they’re talking about putting the vaccine in salad dressing. Have you seen this? I mean it’s – and I’m thinking to myself, this is the Bizarro World, right? This is definitely the Bizarro World,” Flynn said. “These people are seriously thinking about how to impose their will on us in our society, and it has to stop.”

Flynn is right about one thing: he’s definitely living in his own bizarro alternate reality, but the hogwash about vaccines being added to Hidden Valley ranch packets is just the rantings of a sad man trying to achieve some kind of relevancy after trashing his own reputation by aligning with a badly-spray-tanned despot. Still, the way these people convince others to believe this bullsh*t is by taking a kernel of truth and twisting it to fit their fascist-fighting delusions, so here are the totally unremarkable origins of Flynn’s crackpot theory: According to Snopes, Flynn was most likely referencing a preliminary study from the University of California-Riverside. Scientists there are trying to figure out if they can grow produce containing mRNA material so that vaccines with that technology — like the COVID-19 vaccine — won’t need to be preserved by deep-freezing, meaning we could distribute them more efficiently.

So please, don’t stop putting ranch dressing on things. One, it makes everything taste better, and two, no one should deprive themselves of the simple joys in life right now just because of some fear-mongering hysteria.

(Via Rolling Stone)

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