SAINT ANDREW'S NET: SEXY BULLET!
THIS JUST IN: BLACK PEOPLE LIKE MOVIES

C.O.W: HETEROSEXUAL ASS PATS ALL AROUND

By / 11.26.07

For the newbies out there, this is the time of the week when I give shout outs to the people FilmDrunkards who make FilmDrunk such a fun place to waste time. Looking for movie news?  Scroll down.  Looking for hot deals on designer jeans? Try Clyde on the corner of 14th street – the one with the lazy eye. Nominate your favorites for next week here (this post is hidden, so bookmark it).

I think FilmDrunkard of the week must go to RoboPanda, for a series of gems, beginning with a Bruce Greenwood callback from the STRANGE WILDERNESS HAS A TRAILER thread: Did you know that:
0  Jon Peters also wanted Superman to fight a polar bear in the Superman prequel? 
0  Jon Peters also produced Tango & Cash
0  Jon Peters got his break into producing while working as a hair stylist for Barbra Streisand?
0  Jon Peters has many leather-bound books and his apartment smells of rich mahogany?
0  Jon Peters is living large on his 5% residuals from the Oscar-winning Wesley Snipes and Woody Harrelson vehicle Money Train?
0  Jon Peters once hosted the BET Awards and gave every award to Vanilla Ice?
0  Jon Peters kali-ma’d Bruce Greenwood’s heart and ate it to absorb his power?

He also came up with a beautiful anagram for Final Destination, "A sad infinite lot", and got the assist on this one from the HAS KEVIN SMITH SEEN THE AMATEURS THREAD:
RoboPanda says: I was driving through a shitty neighborhood in Missouri and one of the houses had a big piece of cardboard duct-taped to the porch with "PORCH MONKEYS 4 LIFE" spraypainted on it.   
Nominus says: Yeah, those Urban Missourians are fiercely Pro-Life. [Ed Note: Nice teamwork]

From the HAPPY TURKEY DAY FROM TURKEY SHOOT post:
affleckwasthebomb says: As with most people I’d be like "fuck you boss man, I’m going to the holodeck to fuck some hottie"

*the holodeck is not to be confused with the holladeck, which is a platform black people stand on and make shout outs to there homies.

From the SPIDER MAN THE MUSICAL?!?!?! thread:
Jacktion! says: Ow! What’s on my hand? A radioactive spider had bitten me!

Oh! Right in the view of MJ Watson who has smitten me!

Can my day get any worse?

Are these powers a blessing or a curse? [Ed Note: Randall the Homophobic Turtle hated this, but I overruled him.]

From the VAGINAS ARE SCARY post:
Jokerswild says: My ex girlfriend’s vagina wore braces. Not because it had teeth or anything. Because it had polio. [Ed Note: If not for RoboPanda's multiple gems, this probably would've been comment of the week]

Same Thread:
JHC says: Teeth in a vagina=bad, Ears on a penis=intriguing

And last but not least… okay, probably last and least, from the Cloverfield thread:
The Luchador says: I eat pieces of shit like JJ Abrams movies for breakfast!

 


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