When 50 Cent was on a Turkish game show a while back, they challenged him to do a Turkish dance and it was kind of like that scene in Airplane where the anthropologist introduces the African tribes people to basketball and they immediately start throwing alley oops to each other. Meanwhile, Freida Pinto (the female lead in Slumdog Millionaire) was recently on Craig Ferguson, and when she tried to teach him the Bollywood Step, it was sort of a disaster, because Ferguson is Scottish and Scots tend to dance only during alcohol-induced seizures. Also: when did dancing with the host become standard talk show-guest behavior? Should I blame Ellen? If I was a talk show host, I’d have on one of those African ladies to teach me how to balance like 80 pounds of junk on my head because that seems like a really useful skill.