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Knight & Day’s Orwellian ads fail to convince public

By / 06.16.10

It hasn’t ended up online yet, but if you’ve been watching the NBA finals or the World Cup at all in the last few days, you’ve probably seen the new commercial for Knight and Day that prominently features quotes calling it “FRESH” and “ORIGINAL,” and painting it as the island of creativity in a sea of remakes and sequels.  And I guaran-g*ddamn-tee you it was a direct response to trend pieces in the Hollywood Reporter and New York Times about how moviegoers are burnt out on sequels and remakes.

The ads are so hastily cut together that they don’t even attribute the quotes.  It’s just “FRESH” covering the entire screen, with no indication of whether the person who said it was Ben Lyons or DJ Jazzy Jeff (who’ve both been known to describe things as ‘fresh’), or whether the full sentence it came from was actually “Knight and Day is a pile of monkey sh*t that smells especially fresh.”  Are you f*cking kidding me, Knight and Day?  In the era of Pete Hammondses, you couldn’t find one empty suit with whom to identify a positive statement about your movie?

"Knight and Day is a masterpiece. I loved it even more than I love cleaning turds off my own assh*le with my tongue." -Pete Hammond


The silver lining is that, at least according to tracking numbers, the public isn’t buying it.

Remember last week I toldja [ugh -Ed.] that Knight And Day was tracking terribly — no better than Killers? Now the about-to-be-released pic’s tracking is worse. Interest went from 29 on Friday down to 26 on Monday. [Deadline]

That’s promising that Knight and Day is tracking similarly to Killers, considering THEY’RE THE SAME F*CKING MOVIE.  My new boyfriend is a spy???  MY TINY FEMALE BRAIN REQUIRES ME TO FLAIL ABOUT IDIOTICALLY BEFORE JOINING HIM ON A MISSION.

It should be noted that “tracking” (polling people on whether they’re aware of or interested in seeing a particular movie) is wrong as often as it is right.  But my point stands.  F*CK YOU, KNIGHT AND DAY.  I will not see you, even if there are not gays in there.


TAGSCROTCH FONDLEBOMBKNIGHT AND DAYPETE HAMMONDWHORES

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