Afraid you’re too unfashionable to be accepted into the local foppish goth coven? Well I’ve got just the thing: Edward Cullen’s shoes! Brand new from the Pyramid Collection (Myth, Magick, Fantasy & Romance) come these handsome dress shoes, perfect for a Ren Faire mixer or Wiccan prom.
Vampires of distinction love these: glossy, patent-leather-and-velour gentleman’s shoes, fashioned in blood red and midnight black [as opposed to sunrise black...], with large, faceted-crystal medallions on the instep. [source]
Looking through the rest of the Pyramid Collection website, I find that they have separate sections for plus-sized clothing (of course), as well as “coats and capes,” which is great because I’d been searching for a good plus-sized cape. Really, all patent-leather-and-velour shoes should come with a good plus-sized cape included, for your date to wear. They could have matching faceted-crystal medallions like a corsage. That would be hot. Anyway, I’d love to show these to the God-hates-f*gs Twihard, just to see if it would shake her faith. “Oh no, Jesus says velour is an abomination!”