I HATE EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS STORY

Senior Editor
03.18.09 21 Comments

OMG, this drawing of your pre-pubescent fantasy should TOTALLY be a transmedia franchise!!1!

“Zombie Studios” has been developing a first-person shooter videogame called Blacklight for about a year now.  Today, Fox Atomic announced that they’ll be teaming up to CONCURRENTLY develop a Blacklight VIDEO GAME, COMIC BOOK SERIES, and MOVIE.  So, uh, what the hell is it about?

“You play an elite covert ops team that is sent after an American CIA colonel gone rogue who has lost all sense of restraint in his pursuit of the enemy. You’re to either capture or kill him.” said Zombie co-founder Mark Long. [SeattleTimes]

“We are excited by the huge potential ‘Blacklight’ has to succeed across multiple platforms,” said Fox Atomic prexy Debbie Liebling. “It offers us a remarkable franchise opportunity for film.”

Well hell yeah, with a cash cow like this videogame no one’s ever played, milking it for all it’s worth is just good business.  I mean, when you’ve got a crappy Apocalypse Now ripoff on your hands, why stop at movies and comic books and videogames?  Why not a Blacklight energy drink? Blacklight whey protein? Blacklight t-shirts with Blacklight-brand skulls on them and Blacklight anal bead cleanser? HELL, LET’S BUILD A ROCKETSHIP TO MARS AND NAME IT ‘THE BLACKLIGHT’!  NOW CHOP ME ANOTHER LINE, YOU FAGGOTS!

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