05.22.09 8 years ago 8 Comments

Opening this weekend:

Terminator Salvation
You can read more than you probably want to know about it in my review.  Bottom line, it ain’t a bad flick to get dragged to if you’re just looking for something that looks cool and has lots of explosions.  The main difference between this and T2?  In both, the bad guy gets frozen by liquid nitrogen.  In T2 they actually write the liquid nitrogen into the scene.  It’s definitely better than the last Indiana Jones, and definitely worse than Star Trek.  After the jump, you can watch McG explain his favorite scene.

Night at the Museum 2
Haha, way to have kids, loser.  Pretty soon you’ll be going to Night at the Mausoleum.  Haha, I kid because I’m lonely.  On a serious note, I haven’t seen this or the first one, but it looks a lot better than Hotel for Dogs or the one where The Rock plays the tooth fairy.

Dance Flick
Oh joy, another Wayans Brothers movie.  If you’re seeing this you’d have to be pretty hard up for entertainment.  Have you considered suicide?  It may not be *the* answer, but it’s definitely *an* answer.

The Girlfriend Experience
Pornstar Sasha Grey plays a prostitute for Steven Soderbergh.  If it’s not playing in a theater near you, you can still order it on cable.  Other than Ocean’s Twelve, I can’t say as I’ve ever been super disappointed by a Steven Soderbergh flick (Out of Sight is especially underappreciated).  And I’d love to recommend it based on Grey’s presence alone, but really I just wish she’d stop squinting.  Settle down, bitch, it ain’t that bright.

Hey, dude, how ’bout you explain why the hell Christian Bale is growling.  Also? “You. Will not. Kill me.”  …Not a good line.

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