LOINCLOTHS AND MAMMOTHS AND STUFF
THE REQUISITE MITCHELL REPORT POST

STEVE NASH IS FUNNY, MISSING A TOOTH

By / 12.13.07

The Suns defeated the Jazz 103-98 last night in a hard-fought, (dare I say gritty? I do) gritty battle in Phoenix.  Steve Nash led his team with 29 points on 10-of-12 shooting to go with his 11 assists, six rebounds, and one chipped tooth courtesy Carlos Boozer (24/13/4 steals/steroids?).  Fittingly, the chunk of tooth that went missing was a cap that Nash had to get when the Jazz's previous asshole power forward, Karl Malone, cheap-shotted him. 

That's kind of a microcosm of why the Jazz will never win a championship.  Boozer and Deron Williams can't do anything without living in the shadow of Malone and Stockton.  The young duo may be exceptionally talented, but they'll never be the assholes that Stockton and Malone were.  They probably don't even vote Republican.

Elsewhere in the Association: Michael Redd and the Bucks send suddenly slumping Magic to their first three-game losing streak of the year… Sonics rookies step up to ensure that everyone understands the Knicks are worse than they are… Big Baby Glen Davis (not this guy) got his first NBA start, getting 16 points and 9 rebounds (and shooting 10-of-10 from the stripe) as the C's improved to 11-0 at home… The Pacers?  In a violent altercation?  Well, I never!  Troy Murphy's ejection sparks Indiana's 117-102 victory over Chicago.

[Video from Jen's Free Throws


TAGSCARLOS BOOZERNBAOHIO BOBCATSPHOENIX SUNSSTEVE NASH

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