Disgraced former NBA referee Tim Donaghy was sentenced to 15 months in federal pound-me-in-the-ass prison today for his role in the gambling "scandal" that NBA fans can still watch every day during the regular season and playoffs. Commissioner David Stern offered his sincerest words on the subject:
"We anticipate that the judge's sentencing decision… will enable us to continue with the improvements we are making to our anti-gambling rules, policies and procedures," Stern said Tuesday.
"There is little comfort to be gained from the mandatory prison sentence, especially as it affects Mr. Donaghy's children and their mother, but hopefully the healing process can begin in earnest for all."
Oh yeah, Stern's all about the healing. Perhaps there's not much comfort to be gained from Donaghy's sentence… but there's plenty of dollars to be won! Hey Tim, Stern's got 5 grand on you getting shivved on Day 3. If you can avoid any stabbings from crude knives fashioned from chicken bones until then, there's a five percent cut in it for you.
I want more like this!
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