Lost (ABC) — You can see the full-size image of this Simpson-ized version of the “Lost” gang at Springfield Punx (via The Live Feed). For additional “Lost” reading, check out 815 Sentences About Lost, which features writing from the Onion’s AV Club, comedian Jim Norton, and even yours truly. And finally: the “Lost” spoiler Twitter party is back on tonight, with a tentative start time of 9:30. Since I’m starting a little late, tweet spoilers to me at @mattufford. Let’s all ruin it for each other!
Parenthood (NBC) — Series premiere. NBC’s nauseatingly sappy promos for this during the Olympics made me want to push Lauren Graham into a volcano — and I like Lauren Graham. However, as much as I’m prepared to hate this, the SF Chronicle’s Tim Goodman says that it’s actually pretty good, and Goodman is one of the very few reliable TV critics in the mainstream media. (Also: Erika Christensen plays a high-power attorney/mom in her 30s. I feel like not enough time has passed from her playing a teenage seductress in Swimfan to pull that off.)
Southland (TNT) — Season premiere. The episodes that NBC didn’t will now air at the same time as NBC’s new drama. If I were a Nielsen home, I’d watch this strictly out of spite.
American Idol (Fox) — Late-breaking news today, as the scheduled girls’ performance has been bumped to tomorrow because semifinalist Crystal Bowersox is in the hospital. The men — and I use the term loosely — will perform instead.
Players (Spike TV) — Series premiere. Two brothers run a sports bar. One likes drinking, gambling, and women, and the other — wait for it — is totally uptight. Hilarity ensues.
The Daily Show (Comedy Central) — Robert Pattinson is the guest tonight, promoting that crappy-looking movie that co-stars Claire from “Lost.” I’m actually kind of curious to see how Jon Stewart handles such a wildly charismatic actor.