03.05.10 8 years ago 3 Comments

(Diabetics loooooove Ryan Reynolds movies.)

Forget your story structure and character developments (but please don’t forget the beer, so help you God if you forget the beer again), we won’t be needing those where we’re going: it has just be announced that Warner Bros will be releasing the upcoming Ryan Reynold’s Green Lantern movie in 3D! Overheard by a man with one glass eye, this news is being described as both “annoying” and “useless”. Sorry, man.

Scheduled to begin filming later this month, Green Lantern is currently slated with a June 17th, 2011 release date, meaning that we all have exactly 469 more days to put off our sit-up regimes. Hooray!

*peels open can of Spam, drinks contents using a Red Vine straw*

Directed by Martin Campbell (Casino Royale, Edge of Darkness), Lantern casts Reynolds opposite Gossip Girl Blake Lively, Mark Strong, Peter Sarsgaard and Tim Robbins.

Look, this whole 3D craze is getting ridiculously out of hand. Thanks to Avatar’s fame, now every movie exec thinks that if they slap goggles across your face, you’ll want to repeat the movie going experience tenfold. The technology is being used more as a gimmick to entice viewers, rather than a tool that actually serves a purpose for cinematography sake. I don’t need some movie usher punching me in the face during a fight sequence, to convince me that the action on screen is intense, and I sure-as-hell don’t need the illusion of lasers blasting out of the screen, to sell me Ryan Reynolds as the Green Lantern – why, that’d take at least three shots of Zima and a morphine drip.


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