This ‘Instagram Assassin’ Is The Villain The Food World Deserves

10.31.17 2 years ago 11 Comments

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Move over, Hamburglar, there’s a new food villain in town, and he’s here to destroy your food photos. Armed with a fork and an interesting sense of humor, his name is… Kevin (sounds menacing, doesn’t it?).

As an avid Instagram food photographer, I hate this man and I don’t even know him. Many of my friends join in on the fun of fancy food photos with me, standing up to get a full view, or leaning over to the side to make their chocolate cake look like a giant mountain of melty cocoa that they intend on climbing immediately after the photoshoot. However, from the rolling eyes and sighs of “Really?” I receive from other friends, I realize exactly how obnoxious I am to everyone who likes to go to restaurants to, like…eat.

Evil Kevin takes matters into his own hands, literally, by destroying his friends’ food pics before the flash.

Clearly, some of his friends think it’s funny that he would ruin their chances at Instagram photography stardom. Some are pissed off and want him to get them another meal or dessert. Kevin is unfazed by the latter, probably at some later point making the offended party feel a little silly for taking their Insta-exploits so seriously.

Either way, it’s probably hard to stay angry long with Kevin’s infections laugh, which only gets louder as his friends get angrier. I, personally, would be livid, and would only join in with Kevin’s laughing after a swift “Fork you!”

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