FACT: Kids Eat More Calories On Halloween Than The Rock’s Famous Diet

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10 pounds of food. Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson eats ten pounds of food every day. Let’s put that in perspective: an average chihuahua weighs four pounds. So in a (technically non-slanderous) sense, Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson savagely devours 2.5 chihuahuas every day.

But The Rock didn’t become one of the world’s most beloved, franchise engorging, action superstars by eating ten pounds of ordinary food. No, The Rock eats clean. And what does “eating clean” mean? Ten pounds of cod, rice, and other bland, tastebud-punishing, muscle-nourishing food. And with this clean diet, superhuman dedication, and plenty of “FOCUS!”, The Rock was able to transform himself into the human equivalent of a He-Man action figure.

Those ten pounds of food in The Rock’s extremely boring, impossibly massive daily diet contain 5,165 calories. To put that in perspective, the average American eats 3770 calories (which is way too high) but unlike the average American male, not a single one of The Rock’s calories is supplied by Funyuns.

And yet… as impressive as The Rock’s daily calorie count is, on Saturday night, millions of kids will put him to shame.

The kid-friendly equivalent of a Scarface cocaine mound.

The kid-friendly equivalent of Scarface's cocaine mound.

On Halloween night, the average American child will consume between 4800 and 7000 calories. And while these numbers seem impossible, once you look at the nutritional content of popular candy, 7000 calories starts looking a little on the low side.

Though gorging myself on candy was one of my favorite childhood memories of Halloween (and most other days that weren’t Halloween), processing 7000 calories of sugar is a bit much to ask of any pancreas. But with childhood obesity rates finally declining, hopefully we can keep that positive trend going by recruiting a few more heroic monsters to pass out toothbrushes and nickels to trick or treaters.

Of course, when The Rock puts down the sweet potatoes for a cheat day, he regularly eats 11,000 calories of pancakes and pizza, so maybe those candy numbers aren’t so bad, after all.

*** Read Uproxx writer/American hero Mark Shrayber’s attempt to eat 12 pounds of candy in one sitting here. Does this make him more heroic than Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson? I’ll let you decide for yourself. But the answer is yes. It’s a definite yes.***

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