Yesterday on AskReddit, people wrote about the strange and secret things they do behind closed doors with their significant others (NSFW). As it turns out, couples get into some pretty weird stuff when they’re alone. Is some of the weirdness sexual in nature? Very much so. But most of the confessions are surprisingly chaste in their weirdness.
Belly hugs (via VolleyVinyl)
Sometimes, when we hug, we lift our shirts up so that our stomachs are touching. Just feeling outer sensitive skin against each other is really, really nice.
A lot of the time we do it as soon as someone leaves the room. One of us will say “tummies!” And we’ll quickly lift and embrace. Sometimes he shivers. It’s nice.
Edit: also, we programmed the tip of his penis as a Touch ID on my phone.
[Way to finish the post strong VolleyVinyl! -ed]
Phone foot (via aznman375)
Sometimes when she’s feeling down, I take her foot and put it up to my head and pretend I’m talking on the (foot) phone. I’ll have these long, drawn out conversations, and sometimes I’ll get a call on the other line (foot).
Sweatpants monsters (via OId_Gregg)
We put on oversized sweatpants, pull them up to our shoulders, and proceed to chase each other around the house.
Synchronized farting (via EarwaxPanties)
[W]ell..i have never been able to burp…ever..maybe when i was a newborn? But for some reason i just can’t burp…so when I have a stomach ache or a feeling I know is gas I do the “face down ass up” method. Where I lay on my stomach and arch my ass in the air and it helps relieve whatever gas I have..so my girlfriend caught wind of this and was like what is wrong with you. I explained it to her and now she does it. So periodically if you walk into my house you’ll see my girlfriend and I laying on the floor with our asses in the air, farting away.