Movies

This Week’s Coming Attractions: Pierce Brosnan Gets In On The Rampaging Father Genre

Until the teaser for Christopher Nolan’s WWII epic Dunkirk dropped yesterday, sadly without a Harry Styles appearance, I thought that this was going to be a really bad week for good movie trailers. But upon further review, it’s not fair to the art of film to call this a bad week. Instead, let’s call it a really weird week for movie trailers, because in lieu of mainstream previews, we have a rampaging dad feature, some offbeat horror films, one truly bizarre-looking foreign movie, and a Saturday Night Live cast party that looks like a tribute to the best of Chris Farley and John Candy.

Not exactly the best dishes I could bring to a party, but sometimes we have the most fun with the stuff we don’t ever imagine watching. Let’s start the action with Pierce Brosnan doing his best one-percenter Liam Neeson impression.

I.T.

Directed by: John Moore

Starring: Anna Friel, Pierce Brosnan, Stefanie Scott

What’s it about?

Mike Regan has everything he could ever want, a beautiful family and a top of the line smart house. The company he owns is on the verge of changing flight leasing forever. That is, until the relationship with his closest advisor turns nasty, to the point where his teenage daughter is being stalked and his family is under attack through every technological facet of their lives. [IMDb]

This is great! Two of my favorite dumb action movie tropes in one film. We have the nerdy, lonely I.T. guy who is actually a vengeful psychopath and uses his intelligence to ruin someone’s life, and that someone is a dad who goes on a badass rampage to get his own revenge when his daughter is messed with. Throw in an unlikely sports hero returning to the game that he thought he abandoned over fear and/or family obligations years ago, and this might be the greatest movie ever made. I.T. hits VOD on Sept. 23.

XOXO

Directed by: Christopher Louie

Starring: Sarah Hyland, Hayley Kiyoko, Ryan Hansen

What’s it about?

XOXO follows six strangers whose lives collide in one frenetic, dream-chasing, hopelessly romantic night. [IMDb]

I know I’m a 30-something dad because I watched this trailer and looked at my infant son and said, “No way, pal. No concerts for you.” It’s interesting to see Hyland step away from Modern Family and Domino’s Pizza ads to try something a little different. Then again, her role on MoFy has become so repetitive that she could star in anything right now and it would seem groundbreaking. XOXO chills with Netflix viewers on Aug. 26.

Antibirth

Directed by: Danny Perez

Starring: Natasha Lyonne, Chloë Sevigny, Meg Tilly

What’s it about?

In a desolate community full of drug-addled Marines and rumors of kidnapping, a wild-eyed stoner named Lou wakes up after a wild night of partying with symptoms of a strange illness and recurring visions as she struggles to get a grip on reality while stories of conspiracy spread. [IMDb]

My rule of thumb is to generally avoid any movie that features people pulling out their own teeth. It’s just one of those weird dealbreakers I have. But this movie looks strangely fun. At the very least it seems perfect for a night on the couch if you’re a fan of cheap scares and trippy visuals. Antibirth is born on Sept. 2.

Let Her Out

Directed by: Cody Calahan

Starring: Alanna LeVierge, Nina Kiri, Adam Christie

What’s it about?

Let Her Out follows Helen, a bike courier who suffers a traumatic accident. As she recovers, she begins to experience strange episodic-black outs, hallucinations, and night terrors-that lead her to discover that she has a tumor, a benign growth that is the remnants of a “vanishing twin” absorbed in utero. Over time, the tumor manifests itself as the dark and demented version of a stranger. As Helen’s emotional and psychological state begins to deteriorate further and further, she begins to act out in psychotic episodes that are influenced by her evil twin — making her a danger to herself and her best friend, Molly. [IMDb]

This one gets credit for creativity. It’s not often that the scary spirit haunting the pretty young girl is the twin sister she absorbed in utero (this is where someone reminds me it has already been done before). But while Antibirth seems aware of its absurd story and is fun because of it, Let Her Out feels like it’s taking itself too seriously, and that might take away from the horror elements. But I’m hoping for the better, because, again, who doesn’t love it when the twin you ate in your mama’s belly comes back for revenge? She’s Out on Aug. 25 in the UK.

Lace Crater

Directed by: Harrison Atkins

Starring: Lindsay Burdge, Peter Vack, Jennifer Kim

What’s it about?

A woman encounters a strange presence in a guest house. [IMDb]

Okay, I have no idea what is happening with this one. There’s apparently a guy wrapped in burlap or something and now this poor girl is haunted because of their conversation. Maybe it’s just me, as I don’t like to judge what people do at parties, but if someone is wrapped in a sheet or a rug wants to talk to you, politely decline and find someone else. Lace Crater was released on July 29. I just wanted to share this trailer because it’s so weird.

Stille Reserven (Hidden Reserves)

Directed by: Valentin Hitz

Starring: Clemens Schick, Lena Lauzemis, Daniel Olbrychski

What’s it about?

Insurance agent VINCENT BAUMANN is a cold-hearted careerist and slave to a relentless system set in the future who falls victim to the corporations for whom he works. He is demoted to henchman and tries stubbornly to re-enter the job world and fight his way back up the corporate ladder. In the process he encounters the activist LISA SOKULOWA, who not only questions his world but actively fights against it. Through her Baumann comes to realize that there are other values than income and material success. He ends up turning against his former ideology and helping another human being: Lisa. The two of them have no future together. But they can celebrate a small triumph of dignity against the ruling, all-powerful regime. [Screen Anarchy]

The trailer makes absolutely no sense to me, obviously, as I do not understand it one bit. But that plot sounds like a movie I want to see, so hopefully this film will get the English treatment and I can watch it and feel like a movie snob. The Reserves are no longer Hidden in Austria on Oct. 28.

I Am Not a Serial Killer

Directed by: Billy O’Brien

Starring: Laura Fraser, Christopher Lloyd, Max Records

What’s it about?

In a small Midwestern town, a troubled teen with homicidal tendencies must hunt down and destroy a supernatural killer whilst keeping his own inner demons at bay. [IMDb]

This seems fun. It doesn’t look like the best film ever made, but I get this feeling that Christopher Lloyd will play a much darker role than we see in the trailer, and that’s great because he is such a good weirdo. The Killer is loose on Aug. 26.

Brother Nature

Directed by: Osmany Rodriguez, Matt Villines

Starring: Taran Killam, Bobby Moynihan, Gillian Jacobs, Bill Pullman, Rachael Harris

What’s it about?

Roger (Taran Killam), a straight-laced politician has big plans to propose to his dream girl (Gillian Jacobs) at her family’s lake house. But everything goes awry when he meets his potential brother-in-law Todd (Bobby Moynihan): a full-time camp counselor with a heart of gold and a wild sense of fun, pining to be Roger’s best friend, and ultimately catapulting him into a series of unfortunate events. As Roger tries to take a stand amidst outrageous fishing excursions, propulsive water jetpacks and American history-themed musicals, he realizes that being a part of a new family may be more difficult than he’d thought. [IMDb]

I like everyone involved with this movie and yet I cannot figure out why this trailer seems so… blah. It looks like someone mashed up Tommy Boy with The Great Outdoors, and that’s fine (albeit unoriginal) because those are two movies that I love. But there’s not a single moment in this trailer that makes me laugh out loud or even chuckle. That’s very worrisome, but I have faith in this group. Brother Nature opens on Sept. 9.

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