Usually when we mention Star Wars: Episode III — Revenge Of The Sith around here (which is not often), it’s in the context of calling it “barely tolerable” or “the worst.” But now we have a reason to celebrate it. Youtuber GratefulDeadpool took the hilariously incorrect subtitles on a Chinese bootleg DVD of the movie and re-dubbed the entire movie with them, renaming it Star War The Third Gathers: Backstroke of the West. Much like the bootleg Avengers DVD, there’s plenty of gold in the mistranslations. The video above is a highlight reel, and we’ve collected some of our favorite screencaps from the whole movie below.
How did these subtitles get so hilariously garbled? Dorkly explains:
As is the case with lots of bootleg DVDs, this version of Revenge Of The Sith began with a machine translation of the Chinese script to ROTS, which attempted to literally translate from Mandarin to English despite the multitude of barriers between the two languages, and the result was predictably ridiculous.
Among the ridiculous translations are General Grievous repeatedly commanding his underlings to “batter to death them!” And who knew Palpatine was a big fan of Borat and ’90s joke construction? Quite a feat for a guy who lived a long long time ago in a galaxy far far away. You could even say “is all right“, even though Obi-Wan has a bad feeling about this.
You can even watch the full movie, assuming it doesn’t get pulled:
Or you can respond to these subtitles with a resounding “NOOOOOOOOO.”