Congratulations To Vin Diesel, Who Has Officially Dethroned Prince William As ‘The World’s Hottest Bald Man’

It’s been a rough couple of weeks for Prince William. First, his grandmother dies and now he’s no longer the world’s hottest bald man. Poor guy can’t catch a break (except for the whole next in line for the British throne thing).

A recent study by Reboot has determined that Vin Diesel is the best bald boy of 2022. “This year’s study looked at a wider number of factors, such as facial Golden Ratio, Twitter sentiment analysis, net worth, and height. Reboot also looked at the cranial shine factor for each heartthrob. These aspects were then used to create an index score out of 10,” the New York Post reports. Michael Caine’s best friend scored “very highly” in every factor, “giving him the sexiest score of 6.46.” That’s also the number of times Diesel and The Rock are allowed to punch each other in the Fast and Furious movies.

Well, were allowed.

The study shows that [Diesel’s] head is rather shiny, with a cranial luminance of 563.65 candelas per square meter, which means his head reflects light with 70.46 percent of the luminous intensity of a standard light bulb.

The rest of the top 10 (with their scores) goes Stanley Tucci (6.33), Shemar Moore (6.25), Pitbull (6.16), Prince William (6.13), Jason Statham (5.96), Bruce Willis (4.75), Joe Rogan (4.37), Dwayne “The Rock” Johnson (3.62), and Mike Tyson (2.50). Mike from Breaking Bad / Better Call Saul was cruelly and unjustifiably snubbed.

(Via the New York Post)