Lifetime is making an unauthorized made-for-TV movie about Britney Spears. Perhaps you knew this, either because you remember the hilarious promotional picture of the fictional N’SYNC that the network released late last year (LOOK AT FAKE LANCE), or because you just assumed Lifetime had an unauthorized Britney Spears movie in development because it is 2017 and they had somehow not made one already. In any event, the movie is called Britney Ever After and is set to air on February 18, and to get the buzz for it rolling Lifetime posted the first trailer on its Twitter page today.
As you can see, the project will be a nuanced look at Britney’s life and rise-to-fame, and will avoid the more sensationalist tabloid-fodder to focus on the internal conflict she felt as a hyper-sexualized but virginal figure who rocketed into the public sphere before she was old enough to vote, and how society as a whole monetizes teen sexuality while shaming them for it at the same tiJUUUUUSSSSTTTT KIDDING. There’s a close-up of an electric razor less than 10 seconds in. Lifetime stays Lifetime, for better and worse.
This thing is shaping up to be as much of a campy mess as Lifetime’s movies about Saved by the Bell and Anna Nicole Smith, which is really saying something, because those featured a sad drunken Screech moping in a dojo and Anna Nicole Smith doing drugs while wearing sad clown makeup. I mean, respectively. Screech was not in a dojo during the Anna Nicole one. Although I guess he could have in a dojo somewhere offscreen while the events were taking place, now that I think about it. You never know when Screech is gonna be in a dojo, you know?