Let’s Analyze How The Colts-Texans Crapfest Measured On The TURD Index

10.09.15 4 years ago

On Thursday, October 8, the entire football world groaned as they remembered there was a game on that night and it was the Indianapolis Colts against the Houston Texans. This game was already an early contender for what might be the worst match-up of the season. The Colts came into the game 2-2, with both wins coming by miracles against bad competition (the Titans and Jaguars). They were starting 40-year-old Matt Hasselbeck in place of the injured Andrew Luck, and Hasselbeck didn’t even practice all week due to illness. Together with Frank Gore, Andre Johnson, and Adam Vinatieri, the Colts were essentially a retirement home playing football.

They came to town to face a very rough Houston Texans team. J.J. Watt has mostly been quiet this season (at least on the field), Ryan Mallett and Brian Hoyer are having the world’s worst quarterback controversy. Arian Foster was coming back, though, and if the Texans were going to pull something off, this was the time to do it. They did not. They lost 27-20. The game was terrible.

The Texans screwed up first, driving down the field only to have a Mallett pass bounce off of Foster’s hands into the arms of a defender. The Colts then scored 13 points over the next quarter. Foster briefly left for a concussion test, and Mallett exited the game for a few plays after a vicious hit. Mallett would not return to the game as the Texans left Brian Hoyer in, and Mallett spent the rest of the match-up pouting around the sidelines with an angry look on his face.

Then, right before the half ended, Hoyer threw a Hail Mary and the Colts, despite having six players surrounding rookie Jaelen Strong, did nothing to defend him as he pulled in the touchdown. It was Strong’s first NFL reception.

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