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Nothing makes you feel quite as warm on your insides as waking up to read about how the head of your favorite Major League Soccer club celebrated his 50th birthday by beating the shit out of his wife and smothering her with a pillow until she was unconscious. What a great morning.
The 6-foot-5, 250-pound [FC Dallas CEO Hal Douglas] Quinn allegedly pummeled his much-smaller wife’s face and body, choked her with both hands, and held a pillow over her face until she passed out, the sources said.
Quinn was arrested at 4 p.m. on charges of assault and strangulation, and his wife was treated by paramedics at the scene for injuries to her face, arm, legs and eye, which was swollen shut, the sources said. (via NYPost.com)
One of the saddest parts of the story, like with many spousal abuse scenarios, is the part where Quinn’s wife says it just “got out of hand” and that they plan to stay together because they have two young children. The very worst part of it is that the New York Post decided to use SOCK-HER EXEC as it’s headline. F**k you so hard for that, New York Post.
I had a great experience at Pizza Hut Park and had been using FC Dallas as a valiant attempt to get into soccer, but … yeah. It’s not like the team got together and tried to suffocate this woman, but it’s hard to support a squad run by a guy who has a part in sentences like this:
“In these cases, which are usually ‘he said, she said,’ there is often another side to the story, and there certainly is one here,” Hal Quinn’s lawyers said in a statement.
… so it’s probably best that I organize a Help Me Pick A New MLS Team poll and retire my FC Dallas jersey. The Houston Dynamo have a big cross-eyed fox mascot, maybe I’ll go see what they’re about.
[h/t to Randy D.]
![[avatar]](https://profilecdn-woven.netdna-ssl.com/photo/1245/profile)
Seattle Sounders, not only do you get to enjoy spectacularly burning out in the playoffs every year, you can enjoy lording your enourmous hipster fanbase over every other club in the league.
Whats this have to do with some CEO beating his wife half to death? Oooo you used Dallas old name “Burn” to go with the Sounders. Great joke buddy. Really top shelf.
Actually I was answering the question “help me pick a new MLS team” with the Seattle Sounders. I’m not sure what you were reading.
You’re right. Sorry, long week of work and I’m a little punchy. Apologies.
Brohug this shit out, bro?
I’m always down for a good brohug. Also I learned something new, that Dallas used to be called The Burn. Old MLS names are so 90s I’m surprised they all weren’t wearing hypercolor jerseys
Well first off, that is crazy. That dude is an ass. Hopefully the team gets rid of him. (FC Dallas could use some fresh blood anyways.)
Secondly, you should pick the Revs (New England Revolution) as your new team. No one could accuse you of being a glory hunter, we’ve been around since day 1, we have great fans, and also a stupid looking fox mascot if that’s what you’re into. Plus like dudes who shoot muskets when we score.
This would be the happiest story ever if we replaced “Hal Douglas Quinn” with “Shahid Khan” and “wife” with “Gene Smith, Mike Mularkey, Blaine Gabbert, those bitches on the O-line, those bitches on the D-line, those bitches in the secondary, and Justin Blackmon”.
You’ve picked the Rockets for the NBA, might as well go with Houston Dynamo. I’m pretty sure they’re named after a laundry detergent.
I thought Dynamo was just short for “Dynamic-O!”?
Eh, stick with FC Dallas. Surely this clown will get the boot for this and for the team’s lackluster showing soon enough. Stick with FC Dallas and don’t let this asshat’s actions soil the memory Bobby Rhine and other good people associated with FC Dallas.
Chicago Fire.
You should pick Vancouver Whitecaps FC as your new favorite team and here’s why:
1) They’re an up and coming and exciting (and at many times) frustrating team.
2) Their first year in the league saw them have the second worst record in history, only to make the playoffs in their second year (this past season)
3) Captain America, Jay Demerit, is on the team, which makes it extra American to follow the Whitecaps. And if you know his story of how he made it into the MLS, you’ll love him even more
4) They have a fantastic combination of promising prospects and terrible DP’s that everyone wants to run out of town
5) Their youth academy teams are the envy of the league. Which could theoretically mean, hello dynasty.
6)Their jerseys are really nice
7) Following a Canadian team will give you street cred with Canadians.
Steelers or Dallas. Their bandwagons are big enough to accommodate soccer fans as well.
Dallas Cowboys, that is.
Sporting KC, great team, USMNT players such as Zusi and Besler. Plus they are the closest team to you that isn’t full of a$sholes (aka Houston).
I’d go with the Portland Timbers. People can’t tell you you’re a bandwagon fan when the team’s been around less than five years!
Was the picture of her above taken right after this alleged incident?
we are not the kind of website you’re trying to comment on, bro
w/ your Ohio connections I’ll throw in the Columbus Crew
Los Angeles. Big names. Big football. Big soccer.
Does it have to be a MLS team? I’ve been missing football and am thinking about following Celtic FC or one of the Premier League teams.
But if you want a team you can go to games to, go with Houston. That way you can spend a weekend visiting and see both basketball and football games.
Celtic came through with magic against Barcelona last week. That was pretty wild.
Yeah, it was an amazing match. Really glad I decided to check them out instead of one of the Premier league teams that day (one of the games was boring and the other got delayed for twenty minutes because they had a power outage and lost lights).
Toronto FC: Home of the goodwill vampires!
I’d suggest New York but they don’t have a MLS club.
Sadly they do. The reason I stopped following MLS was because I was a huge NY/NJ Metrostars fan. I was willing to keep following them when they changed their name to Red Bulls, but I was 16 and pissed that they dropped the NJ (which was sadly one of the main reasons I got in to soccer; they were one of the few teams that had my home state in their name). Now I don’t want to go back because a) it’s a stupid name and b) I strongly dislike energy drinks and don’t want to cheer for it.