Meet Your New Overlord, The Ohio State Halftime Show Bowl-Flipping Red Panda Acrobat

I know those words don’t make sense all jumbled together, but I swear to God I can make it make sense. Also, yes, I am disappointed that this is a lady called the “red panda acrobat” and not a red panda doing acrobatics.

But anyway, holy crap you guys the Red Panda Acrobat performed at halftime during an Ohio State basketball game, put five bowls on her foot and then flipped them perfectly onto her already bowl-covered head WHILE RIDING A REALLY TALL UNICYCLE WITH ONE FOOT.



More importantly than the whole “how do you flip five bowls onto your head at all” thing,

1. How do you ride a super tall unicycle with one foot?

I wanted to do a full, numbered list of things that amazed me about this but nope, I can’t get over a lady riding a big-ass unicycle with one foot. It seems to defeat the entire purpose of physics and riding a unicycle, right? If I LOOKED at a unicycle I’d fall over. I am not the “red panda” anything.

(I wanna be the red panda something.)