Meet The Perfect Sports Companion: A Dog That Fetches Bottles Of Vodka

Senior Writer
03.01.13 2 Comments

I hope that cap is sealed, right Morrissey? LOL!

Apparently this video has been around for approximately a year, but I hadn’t seen it until late last night, which means that everyone here has to pretend like it’s their first time as well. And yes, that’s how I approach a lot of things in my life.

Meet Tsar the Ukrainian hunting dog, as he is about to become an Internet star (again) for his unique companionship. Basically, Tsar’s owner(s) has trained him to fetch bottles of vodka, and that is awesome for two reasons:

  1. Animals that fetch any sort of alcoholic beverages are instantly awesome. See: This classic Bud Light ad.
  2. The fact that Tsar fetches entire bottles of vodka means that these guys are all putting away multiple bottles of vodka. But I suppose this is more depressing than it is awesome, because in Russia that’s a sign of grizzled manliness, while in America it’s considered alcoholism and “dangerous to the rest of the people on your awesome party boat, Burns”.

In conclusion, Tsar is my nomination for Dog of the Week/Month and/or Year, even if this video was posted last year.

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