Morning Links: D’oh, We’re Still Here

The world’s most publicized doomsday proclamation to date came and went on Saturday. We all gathered on the hill to hold hands and sing, but it turns out the comet was no bigger than a dog’s head. I’m sorry, I’m getting “The Simpsons” and The Bible mixed up again. Sideshow Raheem was in The Bible, right?

Anyway, let’s all be respectful of those extremely extreme religious types in our lives, and not use this as an excuse to mock or deride Christianity. With that in mind, here is a link to something called “rapture bombs” and a bunch of jokes about the Pope.

Our Links, What Art Not In Heaven

Saturday’s Best Rapture Bombs – Man, a “rapture bomb” turns out to be way less scary than you’d imagine. People put their empty clothes on the ground to pretend like they got taken by Our Lord, then take pictures and put them on the Internet. It seems like this would be more fun if they filled the clothes with straw. I’m gonna Gamorrah Bomb somebody and fill my clothes with salt. [Uproxx]

Pope Makes First-Ever Phone Call to Bless Astronauts – “He says even though Catholics in space are weightless, they still need mass.” Now that the pope has been left standing there holding his suitcases, I guess he can move on with his life and start accepting things like science and feelings. [Fark]

First Picture Of Tom Hardy As Bane In Dark Knight Rises – And now that we’ve been left behind, we can get back to caring about things like Batman movie villains. I’m so happy that Tom Hardy gets to play an actual comic book character, and isn’t stuck with “handsome person who works in Gotham” like Joe Gordon-Levitt and Marion Cotillard. [Film Drunk]

Ten Essential Books About Television – Is TV Guide a book? Son of Sniglet? Katherine Hepburn’s Me? [Warming Glow]

Superheroes Drive The Most Ridiculous Rides – I’m including this in the morning links for its inclusion of The Forever People’s Super-Cycle. I am an absolute homer for anything Jack Kirby did in the DC Comics 70s, and think every good fictional charater needs a helmet that covers the sides and back of their head, but not the top or front. [UGO]

Mark Burnett on Donald Trump, ‘The Voice’ & Why ‘Survivor’ Survives – I’ve read this about 200 times and keep seeing “Suvivor Series.” Loosely related side note – swiveling chairs doesn’t make the American Idol concept any fresher, The Voice. [TV Squad]

Moviefone Mash: Pirates ARGGHHH! (VIDEO) – This video is what you expect and want it to be. [Moviefone]

Child’s Play Video Game on the Way – I hope the first half of the game is just you controlling a child who happily plays with a doll. The second half of the game should then let you kill the child with the doll. Maybe the downloadable content will allow you to play as Scott Steiner. [G4]