No Football Means Prayer and Halo

A widely-shared but not necessarily sourced poll from Sports Illustrated reveals that if the NFL season doesn’t happen, people will use their extra time on things less important than football: love, cleanliness, fun, spirituality and communication.

Half of NFL fans (47.5%) say they would watch more non-sports TV and 61.2 percent would watch more of other televised sports without the NFL season. Fans would also spend more time surfing the internet (56.1%), with significant others (45.1%), doing yard work chores (43.6%), playing video games (33.5%) and at church (13%).

Don’t you love how the answers people came up with read like the “activities” category on a 15-year old girl’s Facebook profile? I like surfing the internet, spending time with my boyfriend, hanging out and going to church! It’s also pretty revealing that football fans seriously don’t have anything better to do. The line between a sitcom husband and a vegetative state is whether or not the Browns are playing. And look, they’d rather be on the Internet (surfing it) than spend time with their families. Poll: What would you do if your wife was killed in a car accident? “I’d probably visit more websites.”

Somewhere the guys at Bleacher Report are out trying to end football and kill your wife.