The handsomely charismatic Dr. Drake Ramoray fell down an elevator shaft and was thought to be in a near-permanent coma. That’s bad, but at least he never had his balls stolen? That’s reportedly what happened to Dmitry Nikolaev, a 30-year-old soap star living in Russia, who “had a drink with a ‘young blonde woman’ who approached him at a bar after he finished a performance at a small Moscow theatre.” They hit it off, and she invited him to a sauna because Russia.
He accepted, despite being married, which was the first mistake. The second and third mistakes: losing his left testicle, then his right testicle when this mysterious woman pulled a Dewey Crowe on him.
“They kissed and had some more beer and after that the actor remembers nothing,” said a police source.
He woke up next day at a bus stop, feeling acute pain, and with blood on his trousers.
Rushed to hospital, he was told that his testicles had been removed and that “it was done like proper surgery by someone with a medical education.” The operation was conducted in a “skillful way,” said police, who believe his beer was spiked by an unknown drug. (Via)
Things will eventually be okay for Nikolaev. He now works as a children’s animator, but he’s hoping to finally make his passion project, Чувак, где моя Мячи, or in English, Dude, Where’s My Balls?