Creepy Got Milk? Ads Throughout the Years

Senior Pop Culture Editor
01.06.12 30 Comments

Here’s something I learned today: Got Milk? ads still exist. I thought they stopped being made, oh, about a decade ago, but nope, they’re still running strong. Or still running mediocre, but lazy, in the case of this one for “Modern Family.” Thanks for reminding me, List on Dated Celebrity Endorsements.

The — let’s face it — creepy ads have been running consistently for nearly 20 years now, with such luminaries as former-Atlanta Falcons quarterback Chris Chandler, the Pillsbury Dough Boy, and the Kentucky Wildcats mascot all sporting a Milk Mustache. Dozens of TV stars have also donned the suggestive creamy white soup-strainers over the past two decades. (I, for one, drink malk.) Here are some of the “best.”

He was never on TV, but I don’t care — this actually makes me not want to drink milk.

See the last entry, but with BILLY ZANE.

I’m sure Dennis Franz was a nice guy, but I always imagine him saying things like, “OK, motherfu*kers, you’ve got one chance at this piece of sh*t milk thing, then Sipowicz is getting the fu*k out of here.”

This is actually pretty cool.

If the person who came up with that copy felt proud, no. Just, no.

The subtext of this ad: drink milk or vampires will KILL YOU.

WE HAVE TO GO BACK…I left my milk on the Island.

What happened, JLH?

I actually had this taped to my bedroom when I was in high school. Where were you when I was trying to get laid then, milk? Thanks for nothing.

This feels…illegal. Yeah, that’s the word I’m looking for.

Danger would like to bring your attention to this Awl article, ranking “The O.C.” characters from #22-1. He’s not very happy about it.

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