On this week’s The Bachelor, Bachelor Ben Higgins took the remaining ladies on a group excursion to the Bahamas. Now, bringing a bunch of ladies to a tropical locale (translation: safe, prime time T&A) is not the most unusual thing to happen on The Bachelor — that was, until during a group date on a boat, when one of the women pointed out: “There’s a pig in the water!”
Indeed! There was a pig in the water! Unbeknownst to the ladies, they had been taken to an island in the Bahamas called Big Major Cay, otherwise known as “Pig Beach,” a magical uninhabited island known for being home to swimming feral pigs. I don’t know which producer’s idea it was to take a bunch of women, put them in bikinis, take them to a remote island — give them buckets of food that wild pigs like to eat — then get terrorized by wild pigs, but they deserve a bonus. A big one. And maybe like a car, too. Definitely a helicopter ride with Bachelor Ben, at the very least.
So, how did it go? Thanks to the magic of Hulu’s closed captioning, this screenshot more or less sums the whole thing up:
Here’s the whole scene, if screaming women getting chased by feral, snorting pigs is your thing (how is that not anybody’s thing?):
But I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention the other great thing that happened on The Bachelor last night, during a two-on-one date between this season’s villain Olivia and the remaining twin Emily. In a twist, not only did Olivia end up getting dumped by Ben, but she was then forced to stand around and watch while he gave the date rose to Emily, before the two sailed off and left her stranded on a deserted island.
Olivia from The Bachelor getting left on an island is the new “senior dog that cried watching its family leave with a younger dog.”