The New ‘Dallas’ Looks Meh-rific

07.12.11 7 years ago 17 Comments

Co-starring Larry the Cable Guy's brother, Barry the Oil Guy

Below is the first trailer for TNT’s continuation of “Dallas,” which won’t air until next summer. The original CBS series, of course, spanned 13 seasons from 1978 to 1991 — and now Patrick Duffy and Larry Hagman will reprise their roles as Bobby and J.R. Ewing in the new series, which “will primarily center around J.R. Ewing’s son John Ross Ewing III, and Bobby Ewing’s adopted son Christopher Ewing.” [Wikipedia]
Christopher and J.R. the 3rd are played, respectively, by a young Carson Daly lookalike and a Jonathan Rhys Meyers impersonator who can’t grow facial hair. In the trailer, there’s some yelling about money and oil, Jordana Brewster doesn’t have pants on, somebody has a shotgun, a girl takes her shirt off, Hagman’s caterpillar-like eyebrows threaten to leave his face and take over the city, someone gets slapped, and more yelling. Basically, it looks like the new “90210” if Jason Priestly and Luke Perry were teachers at the high school. I will enthusiastically not watch this.

[via EW]
Poor Patrick Duffy. Remember when he was an actor, and not Scuzzlebutt’s leg?

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