Pete Holmes Fires Rogue From The X-Men. Obviously.

The Pete Holmes Show posted a new “Ex-Men” segment in which he portrays Professor X, insulting and firing mutants like Nightcrawler, Iceman, Jubilee, Angel, Gambit, and Wolverine.

Now he’s firing Rogue, the obvious reason being, “Insurance is through the roof, and having an unintentional energy vampire just going around touching sh-t? It’s just not going to work for the next quarter.”

He then slams her for somehow constantly forgetting she’s not supposed to kiss the other mutants, and he isn’t going to countenance her excuses.

“I wish I could control my powers.”

“And I wish I could walk. It’s wish time? How long does this go?”