Well, I suppose this was inevitable: Charlie Sheen’s soundbites of insanity have been appropriated for The Charlie Sheen Pyramid of Greatness based off the original Ron Swanson Pyramid from “Parks and Recreation.” As you might expect, “WINNING” is the capstone. You can peruse the high-resolution version here, but in the meantime here are a couple of my favorite entries:
US — Rhymes with “winning,” anyone? That’ll be us.
IT’S ON — Sorry, America. I said it.
MY BRAIN — You’d be like, “Unplug this bastard!”
SHRINKS — Bring me Dr. Clownshoes!
I know that we’re reaching the point in the news cycle where we’re starting to get Charlie Sheen fatigue, but I have to stress what a landmark pop cultural event we’re experiencing right now. In the span of a week, I went from hating Charlie Sheen for being a drug-abusing misogynist to standing in awe of his addictive cult of personality. He’s still the same A-hole he’s always been, yet he’s won me over with his relentless, delusional silver-surfing of the media tsunami. He cured me of my hatred for him WITH HIS MIND. He blinked and it was gone. Can’t is the cancer of happen, people.