10.02.09 9 years ago 16 Comments

During last night’s “Late Show,” David Letterman addressed the audience with a ten-minute monologue that detailed how a CBS News employee tried to extort him for $2 million with threats to reveal that Letterman had sex with female employees of “The Late Show.” I recommend reading the AP news story for details, but amazingly, because Letterman sprinkled the speech with jokes, his story of blackmail and illicit sex was received warmly by the audience. At the 7:45 mark of the video above, Letterman finally gets around to what he was being extorted for:

“The creepy stuff was that I have had sex with women who work for me on this show. Now, my response to that is: Yes, I have.” [APPLAUSE]

I absolute love the audience cheering that. “WOOO SEX WITH EMPLOYEES! Way to stick it to ’em Dave!” I’d kind of like to see what kind of admissions you can win people over with just because you’re the victim of blackmail. “So, after I went through this horrible ordeal, I feel I should tell you that, yes, I did kill those hookers and leave their bodies in wet cement when I got my driveway re-paved. But they were already dead on the inside, amirite?”

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