Earlier today, the Internet discovered that comedian and actor Kumail Nanjiani, the star of Silicon Valley and The Big Sick, got jacked. And in case you forgot what the dude who once looked like a leafless twig while standing next to Dave Bautista’s girthy tree trunk, check it out below.
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I never thought I’d be one of those people who would post a thirsty shirtless, but I’ve worked way too hard for way too long so here we are. You either die a hero, or you live long enough to see yourself become the villain. I found out a year ago I was going to be in Marvel’s Eternals and decided I wanted to transform how I looked. I would not have been able to do this if I didn’t have a full year with the best trainers and nutritionists paid for by the biggest studio in the world. I’m glad I look like this, but I also understand why I never did before. It would have been impossible without these resources and time. So big thanks to @grantrobertsfit who started working with me at the beginning of the year and made me understand true physical pain for months and months. Then, once we started shooting, a massive thanks to @davidhigginslondon and his team (@ellispartridge, @thebeardypt, @tomcheesemanfitness) for training me almost every day and making me strong, limber and injury free. I can almost touch my toes now. (And thank you for forcing me to do cheat meals David.) Matthews Street Catering for their delicious and healthy meals. And finally, the biggest thanks goes to @emilyvgordon for putting up with me complaining and talking about only working out and dieting for the last year. I promise I’ll be interesting again some day. #thirstyshirtless (Photo by @markupson.) (edit: I left off one very important person: @lancecallahan who trained me for 6 years and helped me build the foundation I could use to do this. Thank you!)
So, why all the new muscle? Evidently, Nanjiani has packed all this mass onto his otherwise small frame because of his commitment to Marvel’s upcoming film The Eternals, in which he plays the nearly-immortal non-human warrior Kingo Sunen. (He’s also starring alongside the likes of Angelina Jolie, Salma Hayek, Kit Harington, and more.) Whether or not this is actually the case is unknown, but considering the rather beefy assortment of male actors whose frames have expanded due to their Marvel contracts, it’s an easy bet to make.
Anyways, Kumail’s radical transformation didn’t actually happen overnight, but since the photos he shared on Instagram were the first public indication that anything had happened, people just couldn’t deal with it. As a result, the wide array of reactions that popped up on Twitter and elsewhere on social media were as thirsty as they were funny.
No one is going to mistake me for Kumail anymore https://t.co/hRdGaGdjAD
— Hasan Minhaj (@hasanminhaj) December 17, 2019
since yall think all brown folks look the same anyway feel free to confuse me for kumail nanjiani whenever you want now https://t.co/uTWRPqFtpU
— Simran Jeet Singh (@SikhProf) December 16, 2019
Marvel fans: "Oh no! RDJ and Chris Evans are leaving the MCU. What are we going to do??"
Simu Liu and Kumail Nanjiani: "I think we can be of assistance…" pic.twitter.com/ztzFZiJ2oe
— Curtis Kimberlin Jr 🎄 (@ckimberlinjr) December 16, 2019
MCU fans: Where are we to acquire thirst memes now that Chris Evans and RDJ are leaving
Kumail: Hold my 8-pack
— G. Willow Wilson (@GWillowWilson) December 16, 2019
My whole day has been thrown off by learning that Kumail Nanjiani is ridiculously jacked now
— Patrick Wyman (@Patrick_Wyman) December 16, 2019
Kumail works out at the same gym as I do so in a way this is a victory for both of us, equally pic.twitter.com/adVdEvipDn
— Chase Mitchell (@ChaseMit) December 16, 2019
has trump photoshopped his head on that picture of kumail yet
— Sarah Beattie (@nachosarah) December 16, 2019
Or rather …. *lowers sunglasses* …. newc*mmers
— Matthew D'Ambrosio™️ 🎁☃️ (@drmattdambrosio) December 16, 2019
Gassed up kumail covered in baby oil doing fucking dreamworks face. Horrible. I wish the world ended in December 2012 like the Mayans said it would
— Kath Barbadoro (@kathbarbadoro) December 16, 2019
esquire is gonna do another comedy issue with kumail on the cover. “the year comedians got hot” it’ll say. inside will be a four page roundtable on pete davidson
— Seth Simons (@sasimons) December 16, 2019
Though, to be honest, the best response came from Emily V. Gordon, co-writer of The Big Sick and Nanjiani’s wife.
My husband works hard for every role he takes, but he's worked hard in many new ways for this one. I'm so proud of him. I always have been.
Also, we spent the majority of this past weekend playing Borderlands 3 so don't think he's changed too much. https://t.co/AzlrdgXtHX
— Emily V Gordon (@emilyvgordon) December 16, 2019
Second place goes to Edgar Wright.
Re-do the second half of THE BIG SICK and have Kumail be buff when you wake up from the coma.
— edgarwright (@edgarwright) December 16, 2019