Should your favorite NFL team have lost in the most heartbreaking, brutal way possible during the early slate of games this afternoon — like my Carolina Panthers, and now I’m going to drink a bottle of bleach — you’re going to need something to distract you from your misery. Like, say, a video tape from 1991 featuring a nine-year-old boy dancing and singing to “Vogue” in front of the worst green screen footage you’ve ever seen.
I’m pretty sure he’s now the bassist for Mandonna.