Starting with his campaign and continuing through his presidency, Donald Trump repeatedly boasted about his brain, his very large brain, and how special and smart it is. While the obsession with his big brain seemed like one of his random public speaking tics, former White House communications director Stephanie Grisham’s new book, I’ll Take Your Questions Now, reveals that Trump was allegedly concerned with his noggin even behind closed doors.
In an excerpt published by Politico on Friday, Grisham shares an anecdote about Trump refusing to accept a charity challenge from a child because it might damage his unparalleled thinking power, throwing the nation into chaos:
On another occasion around the new year, a young boy started publicly challenging Trump to go vegan in TV ads and on highway billboards. If the president agreed, the boy said, the charity he represented would donate $1 million to veterans. I was communications director at the time and I playfully asked the president if he would ever consider doing that, since the challenge would raise a lot of money for a good cause. I knew he loved his steaks and cheeseburgers, but one month didn’t seem that long.
Trump’s response was swift, and his tone was suddenly very serious.
“No, no. It messes with your body chemistry, your brain,” he said, offering his views on vegetarian diets. “And if I lose even one brain cell, we’re f*cked.”
Of course, it should be noted that in the same book, Trump frantically called Grisham personally to assure her that his penis was not small or shaped like a toadstool, and he reportedly required a dedicated “Music Man” (Grisham’s ex-boyfriend) to play “Memories” from the Broadway musical Cats whenever Trump was on the “brink of rage.” In short, those are definitely the signs of a bold and beautiful mind that should be protected from veggie burgers at all cost. Tofu dogs? Don’t even think about it. We’ll all be dead by morning.