A National Survey Reveals That Americans Approve Of Pineapple On Pizza

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It’s no secret that Trump’s presidency has been riddled with controversy. Between his unreleased tax returns, claims that Obama had Trump Tower wiretapped, the administration’s healthcare policies, the Trump staff’s interactions with the media, plans to construct “the wall,” alleged ties to Russia, Trump’s deceptive cabinet appointments, intervention in issues of womens’ rights, Trump’s executive order on immigration, what were we saying? Oh yeah — the controversies!

Despite the significance of the above mentioned issues (among heaps and heaps of others) people are also inexplicably concerned about the partisan response to a few food issues, namely pineapple on pizza and ketchup on steak. Lucky for us, has released some fascinating new statistics to help everyone sleep at night.

First, ketchup on steak is a disaster and we can now confirm that the majority of people agree. Public Policy Polling asked, “Do you approve or disapprove of using ketchup as a condiment on steak?” and 27% of people said they approve, 56% said they disapprove, and 17% said they weren’t sure.

Let’s be clear, there are plenty of grossly pretentious things people get upset about when it comes to food — like eating pizza with a fork and knife and double dipping — but the issue of ketchup on steak is different and we’re jazzed to learn most people agree. By the way, to respond “not sure,” to this question is chilling. You know what ketchup tastes like, you know what steak tastes, NOW FINISH THE EQUATION!

The seemingly more important question asked by the survey was this: “Do you approve or disapprove of having pineapple as a pizza topping?” Turns out, 47% of people approve, 32% disapprove, and 20% don’t know! WHAT THE HECK? Just guess! That’s way too many people who don’t know themselves enough to take a stance on pineapple. And there’s something seriously wrong with that.

Congrats, to the winners! Enjoy your cheesy, saucy, juicy, pineapple slice. We’ll be over here avoiding any and all of it!