All The ‘Mallrats’ Quotes Kevin Smith Fans Are Still Repeating

11.19.14 5 years ago 18 Comments
I was introduced to Kevin Smith movies at a young age — 11 to be exact — when my brother’s friend brought a VHS of Clerks to my house, and we watched it huddling around a 13″ fuzzy TV in his bedroom. And because we loved it, the same week my brother purchased a copy of Mallrats, which quickly became the most played and quoted VHS in my house.

For that reason, here I present to you all the Mallrats quotes you know you’re still repeating…

“Wow, a sailboat!” — Kid 1

Everyday use: When you’re quicker than your friends.

“Do it, Doug!” — Jay

Everyday use: When you’re rooting for the underdog.

“You have a third nipple?” — T.S.

Everyday use: When you’re there for entirely different reasons.

“You f*ckers think just because a guy reads comics he can’t start some shit?” — Brodie

Everyday use: When there’s more to you than meets the eye.

“The bastard’s faster than Walt Flanagan’s dog!” — Jay

Everyday use: When you underestimate your opponent.

“‘Why buy the cow, when you can get the sex for free.'” — Brodie quoting his Grandma

Everyday use: When an old idiom need a facelift.

“Your maleness amazes me sometimes.” — T.S.

Everyday use: When your friend is acting too macho.

“The customer is always an a**hole.” — Shannon

Everyday use: When you work retail on Black Friday.

“There is no Easter Bunny! That over there is just a guy in a suit!” — William

Everyday use: When a kid gets the best of you.

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