The Asylum Has A ‘Fifty Shades Of Grey’ Knockoff And It Looks Predictably Terrible

The Asylum, the madness factory behind Sharknado and those movies with titles that sound enough like real movies that they almost trick you into ordering them on VOD, has again done their magic, this time creating their very own Fifty Shades of Grey knock-off. And it is Fifty Shades of GREAT.

Starring Charisma Carpenter (Cordelia Chase, what are you even doing? This is the worst thing to happen to you since Connor), Daniel Baldwin (as Carpenter’s father; they are 10 years apart), Terrell Owens (seriously) and someone named Bryce Draper in the not-Christian Grey role. His other films include Muck and Muck: Feast of St. Patrick: The Prequel to Muck. It’s a real who’s who of “wait, who?”

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The plot, acccording to Dread Central:

In a world of dominance, submission, and lust, the story follows the life of Michelle Milan (Carpenter), a wealthy divorcée and single mother working for her father, Walter (Baldwin), a Beverly Hills real estate mogul. Milan meets Ryan Black (Draper), a bold and sexually adventurous younger man who introduces her to the world of BDSM. Milan’s high-pressure life and values are thrown into question by her newfound romance, as she strives to navigate through a labyrinth of dangerous love and lust, high-powered business decisions, and keeping her family and her sanity in one piece.

Let us know what you think of it when you accidentally order it thinking it’s the Jennifer Tilly/Gina Gershon one.