A High School Homecoming Dance Was Called Off Because Of Miley Cyrus’ Butt

09.03.14 4 years ago 12 Comments
miley butt


Lest you think Footloose takes place in a fictional land where Bacon is a person and not a delicious meat, a high school principal in Bennington, Vermont, has cancelled the homecoming dance because the dang kids won’t stop twerking. Let’s hear it for the butts. Things are getting so out of control, Principal Sue Maguire even wrote an op-ed in the local newspaper, the Vermont version of the Drudge Siren.

Over the past couple of years, since Miley Cyrus took the stage “twerking” at the 2013 MTV Video Music Awards, our students’ dancing behavior has crossed the line of what we can condone as appropriate behavior at a school. Twerking is dancing to popular music in a sexually provocative manner involving a low squatting stance and thrusting movements. Students do not face one another or remain with the same person for the length of the song.

If you haven’t seen twerking, I would encourage you to research this online. (Via)

The person who researches “twerking” is the same SOB who thinks 4chan is a person.

As we have researched this issue, we have learned that communities across the nation are struggling to find the balance between free expression and appropriate school behavior at dances. In speaking with other school administrators, they have informed us that dances have been canceled in other high schools in our state and in nearby Massachusetts and New York.

Everything else planned for homecoming is continuing. We plan on having spirit week, the pep rally, and of course, the homecoming game. (Via)

Looks like H. Jon Benjamin needs to do another Kickstater, this time to bring Kenny Loggins to Bennington, where he can teach Principal Maguire the art of dancing…and love.

The Bennington Banner via Gawker

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